The media should be consistent :Weinstein sex scandal

22 10 2017

The media’s excoriation of Harvey Weinstein, a movie producer, for his taking advantage of women working for him by pressuring them into having sex is at best self contradictory.
Everyone knows the tons of pornographic filth churned out each year as blockbusters that are glorified by the media and as a result has gone on to win Oscars.
These movies exult marital infidelities, scandals, defamations, divorce, lying, cheating… at times, perverse ‘lifestyles’ are ‘aired out’ to attract public curiosity though without any attempt to treat the subject on a moral plane as the sinful evil that they have done grave damage to society’s morals. Consequently today many have lost or are losing their sense of sin and consequently, they are losing their sense of God.
The dismal list of sexual abuse by respected public figures like Roger Ailes, Bill Cosby, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, Bill Clinton, are only the first rumble of a volcano in full eruption.

What about college campuses? What goes on in there are unspeakable! The chronic sexual assaults happening on daily basis inside these ivory towers, testify that when unnatural behaviors contrary to divine laws are now treated as the normal course of things in films, on television, in the press, common sense, decency and nobility vanishes in society

As Peter Maurin said, “A good society is one that makes it easy for its citizens to be good. And a bad society is one that makes it easy to be bad.”

The media and Hollywood has made it incredibly tough for citizens to be good. There are over 2000 registered companies in the US alone that produces adult movies and millions of porn websites available on smart phones at the touch of the screen

All I am saying is that the media should be consistent!
It’s unreasonable and unjust to glamorize adultery and fornication on screen and turn-around and scowl when men live out these dreams.
Why pretend to be shocked? People are what they watch or in the case of Weinstein, what they do?
Perhaps, the London motion picture Academy did right by stripping Weinstein of his fellowship but, it should also strip itself, because it shares a part in the problem.





10 Lessons on How  to Save  Your Family 

1 09 2017


Opening our eyes, we can see that the family in serious crisis. This being the case, as followers of Christ and defenders of the Domestic Church—the family—let us launch a concerted effort to save our children, save our young, by the means of saving our families. Pessimism, cynicism, and skepticism must not reign in our hearts, but rather confidence and hope that we can help construct a better world by striving for better, more holy families.

Therefore, we would like to offer Ten Vitamins to Vitalize Families. By this we mean to offer ten concrete suggestions to help all of us purify, improve, and perfect our families. Saint Pope John Paul II expressed this truth so clearly: The family is the basic building block of society… and… As the family goes, so goes the society. Hopefully these suggestions will truly make a difference in your struggle to form a good family. Never forget the consoling words of the Archangel Gabriel to Mary that we read in the Annunciation: Nothing is impossible with God.

1. Family Prayer

One of the primary reasons for fights, quarrels, bitterness, coldness, and eventually separations is the lack of prayer in the family. What oxygen is to the lungs, so prayer is to the soul. Prayer should be at the very center and heart of family life. Remember the words of the famous Rosary-priest, Father Patrick Peyton: The family that prays together, stays together.

2. The Father as Head of the Family

When possible, the Father must be the head of the family; the Mother should be the very heart of the family. A family without a head is a Frankenstein; a family without a heart is dead. May the Father assume the role of Spiritual Leader of the family! If you like, the Father should be the priest of the family. This means, the Father should say Yes to life. The Father should love his wife and children. The Father should be the spiritual leader of the family and this means the leader in the prayer life of his family. The most splendid example for the Father should be the best of Fathers, good Saint Joseph!

3. Forgiveness and Mercy

In many families coldness, indifference, and even bitterness permeate the entire family fabric. Why? One of the reasons is due to a lack of forgiveness. Family members must be merciful and forgive, and not just seven times, but seventy times seven times—meaning always! If we want to be forgiven, then we must forgive from our hearts. The Our Father commands this: Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.”

4. Winning and Victorious Words
The British poet, Alexander Pope penned these words: “To err is human, to forgive is divine.” Family members, cultivating true humility of heart, must learn to say these words: “I am sorry…” and equally important: “I forgive you!” These words said often and with humility of heart can save families!

5. Servant Attitude

Jesus, Son of the living God, washed the feet of the Apostles at the Last Supper. He Himself stated: “The Son of man has not come to be served, but to serve and give His life in ransom for many.” (Mt 20:28) Each and every individual family member must not look to be served, but to be always ready to serve the other members in the family. Love and service are really synonymous.

6. Express Graditude

Even though it is small, and at times, seems to be almost insignificant, these two words can add a condiment to the family recipe, and these two words are Thank you! Saint Ignatius of Loyola asserted: “ The essence of sin is ingratitude.” Cultivate in your families an attitude of gratitude! In sum, what do we have that we have not received from God? Only one thing: our sins—these we chose for ourselves. God loves a humble and grateful heart!
7. Take a Break From Gadgets

A key time in family life must be the meal time. Normally it is when the family connects, comes together to share experiences, to spend time with each other, to bond with each other, in a word, to grow in love with each other. Our Lord’s Last Commandment was: “Love one another as I have loved you.” (Jn 13:34)
There is a comic strip with a family all sitting together on the same big couch. The Father is watching TV, the mother is on her tablet, the son is playing a computer game on his laptop, the teenage daughter is sending a text from her phone, and the family dog has earphones on. We laugh at this, but we also weep, because we can see our own family in this comic strip. Therefore remember, at meal times—even though it might be a mere 20-25 minutes—no phones, tablet, computer, radio nor TV. Each person has infinite value, and their soul being immortal will live forever; the computer screen and all other electronic gadgets will come and go and be disposed of!
8. Learn to Listen

How hard the art of listening really is, especially with family members. We all tend to be in the fast-lane, frenetically rushing from one activity to the next like a chicken with it’s head cut off. As such we fail to listen attentively when a family member wants to talk to us. I invite all to seek out Harry Chapin’s song Cats in the Cradle. In short, this song woefully mourns the sad fact that Fathers never really connect with their children because they are simply too busy! Son, I will listen to you, but later… Later never becomes a reality; then it is beyond his grasp!

9. Celebration

The famous Catholic author Jean Vanier, who founded a group working most especially with the handicapped, and with forming families with handicapped members, made this discovery: families are called to celebrate!

Birthdays, Anniversaries, Holidays such as Christmas and Easter, and many more—all are festive and exuberant moments of celebration in the context of the family. We should celebrate the other in the family —especially their birthday, Baptism, and saint day! Therefore, if you want to inject a good dose of joy in your family, get in the habit of celebrating! Saint Paul exhorts us in these words: “Rejoice in the Lord always; I say it again: Rejoice in the Lord.” (Phil. 4:4)
10. Marian Consecration

In my retreats, I have often presented an efficacious means to arrive at the very Heart of Jesus. This is done by spending about a month meditating upon the 20 mysteries of the Rosary, with a helpful commentary for each, followed by a meditation on the Seven Sorrows of Mary, each with a commentary. At the end of these days of preparation for consecration, all the members of the family will formally consecrate themselves, individually and as a family, to Jesus through Mary. Our Lady will then be at the very heart of their family. Our Lady will produce abundant fruits in their family: peace, joy, love, happiness, sharing, understanding, patience, purity, meekness, kindness. In a word, by consecration to Jesus through Mary, families will become sanctuaries of true holiness as Jesus commanded: Be holy, as your heavenly Father is holy. (Mt 5:48)

You can lead your family in such a retreat with my guide, Total Consecration Through the Mysteries of the Rosary.

I am convinced that if families truly allow Mary to take root in the center of their lives, she will help their lives be turned from water into wine, and will truly be able to live out the greatest commandment of Jesus: Love one another as I have loved you! (Jn 13:34) I hope and pray that all will take these Ten Vitamins to Vitalize and form vibrant and holy families!

by Fr. Ed Broom, catholicexchange.com August 29, 2017





 It’s not worth the risk

22 08 2017

condoms

I had a chance encounter with someone at the swimming pool recently that got me thinking. He works for a foreign NGO that deals with HIV/AIDS prevention and treatment in Africa.

“We go around educating people with the illness about the importance of taking their drugs,” he said.

“Why is that necessary?” I asked, wondering why someone living with AIDS would need an agency to remind him to take his drugs.

“They are ashamed,” he replied, “there is a strong stigma attached to AIDS in this country and people simply do not want to be identified or known as having AIDS.”

“I can understand that,” I said.

“Yes.  So, even though we are offering the drugs free, yet people don’t want to come forward to collect them. Many people are living in suicidal denial

“Human beings are very complex,” I said.

“But do you have preventive program as well?” I asked.

“Yes, we promote the use of condoms.”

“Are you aware of the claims that condoms are not foolproof, some even have holes big enough for Aids viruses to easily pass through?

“That has not been scientifically verified,” he countered.

I smiled.

“But I am sure you aware from experience perhaps, that fingernails can scratch holes through latex condoms?” I continued.

He smiled and began speaking truthfully.

“Yeah, you are right,” he said, “many of the condoms are even expired without the user’s knowledge. And many people don’t check expiry dates before putting them on if at all they do.”

“Sex is a passionate affair,” I said, “and in the heat of passion, people get carried away and become careless.”

He smiled. Looking cornered, he said, “In the absence of better solution, what else can we do?”

“But there is a better solution,” I said with another smile.

“Abstinence?” he asked.

I nodded.

 

“I know, but how many people can control themselves?” he scoffed.

”It is not easy I agree, but when you challenge people, they can do a lot. At least warn them of the dangers and educate them about the abstinence alternative.”

He nodded. There was a thoughtful look in his eyes.

I continued, “Consider for a moment how doctors and nurses wear gloves, and surgical masks and gowns when going in for a surgery. Compare that to the level of protection offered by a single condom. Besides, we are not talking about just HIV/AIDS; there is a host of other sexual and nonsexual transmitted diseases which can be transmitted during sexual acts.

He was silent.

“Plenty of different body fluids are exchanged during intercourse” I added.

“You are right,” he admitted again, “abstinence and mutual fidelity is the only prevention worth promoting. The stakes are two high, and it is not worth the risk of using a condom.”

We concluded and shook hands. He was an honest man and I left the pool feeling that I had made a friend.  I promised to send him an article I wrote many years ago on the “Bleak stories behind failed condom campaigns”

 

From the Editor

Chinwuba Iyizoba





​The Story of Pure Love: Armando and Martha 

17 08 2017

22yrs Armando Valladares, a young journalist was working at his desk at a newspaper company when soldiers came to ask him to publish a communist propaganda supporting the new government of Fidel Castro. 

 He refused knowing full well that there would be consequences. He didnt have to wait long.  Armed soldier stormed his residence at night and arrested him. 

 For refusing to support communism, Armando was sentenced to 30 years in prison. He was arrested in the middle of the night and transferred to a notorious prison where hundreds of enemies of communism were beaten on a regular basis. 

But it was in this prison that Armando received a miracle in the form of a woman he met. She was one of the daughters of fellow prisoner and her name was Martha. 

They fell in love when they met, and began to write each other in secret. 

Years of communicating together deepened their love for one another. 

When the communist tried to force Armando to enroll in a compulsory reeducation program, Armando and his companions again refused. 

As a punishment, he spent 8 years in a special solitary confinement, with no windows, and no light coming in, only a small hole for his wastes. 

After 10years, the communist tried another technique, promising him freedom if only he could sign a document praising communism.

 But instead of signing his name, Armando, took the document and started writing poetry at the back. The guards tried to stop him but he changed tactics, writing with his blood instead on the back of onion skins which he smuggled out to Martha.


As the holocaust survivor, Victor Frank once said, “A man can endure any how a long as he has a why” From then on, nothing the soldiers did could hurt him anymore. 

His love for Martha broke down the prisons walls as he wrote poem to her using his own blood, and fresh breeze of love lifted him high, carrying him towards the sun.

Martha fled to the United State, and published thr peoms which became a bestseller raising a campaign against what Castro’s government was doing to her beloved. 
Amnesty international and other human rights group caught on and pressed the Cuban government for his release. 

Terrified of his growling fame the communist tried an old police trick to shatter his unshakable love for Martha.

They told him that Amnesty groups had dropped name from their list of prisoners of war, and that Martha had abandoned him. 

He responded in a serene and cheerful way saying, Now I know for certain that my Martha is succeeding in getting me out.”

He was right; a short time later, he was released from the prison where he had spent 22 years, unbroken, defending his own conscience,  and the dignity of every man to live in the freedom of theirs. 

His 22 years of unbroken resistance to tyranny demonstrated that man is capable of withstanding great evils when he loves and he is loved by another.

On his release from prison, he was finally united with his sweetheart Martha and he was caught on camera showering her with kisses right front and center before the flashing lights and world media. They got married soon after,  a crowning perseverance of love. 






​  A True love Story: Clare and Francis 

15 08 2017

I was reading the story of Dolores Hart, a very successful actress who left 



Hollywood to become a nun. Wondering what could make someone do such a thing, I breezed through the pages until I came to the part that best explained her eventual decision to become a nun. According to her, the highlight of her career was her part as Clare, in the movie Francis of Assisi, directed by Michael Curtiz.  

[This movie is about 1 hour long,  but worth everything minute of your time] 


Set in the 13th Century, the movie revolved around the life of two young people, Francis and Clare who loved each other. But Francis, the son of rich cloth trader, felt a voice calling him for something higher beckoning him to leave Clare the pretty daughter and all the worldly luxury of his fathers house. He followed the voice, stripping himself of everything to become a beggar friar. Clare rather than flaring up and throwing a tantrum, sought to understand him. She not only let him go, but joined him on his way to God. Thus was born St Francis and St Clare of Assisi. Two people who change the world.  

Another character in the movie, a friend of Francis and a knight, lusted after Clare. But rather than keep his love for her sacred, when he realized she was giving her life to God, he took to drinking and having sex with other girls.

Clares steadfast love for Francis, and his undying love for her, even when they knew that they could no longer belong to each other, is a good example for many young people today who are often lost, swept away by the putrid tide of impure lust lashing against them. Many think it is impossible to remain a virgin and keep a boyfriend.  This film offers us a clear vision of what true and perfect love looks like. The pure love of youthful Francis and for his pretty girlfriend, Clare opened his eyes to an even greater love, the love of God.  

Guys and girls should understand that true love, rather than being an occasion for premarital sex and all sorts of immorality, frees the heart to see the other as a gift and above all to see through the other to gaze on God, the creator, whose love surpasses all.

Girls in romantic relationships, if they can, should go and visit Santa Chiara, the Gothic church that contains the tomb of Saint Clare. Her 708-year-old body was laid out in a glass coffin. It was a wonder to see, uncorrupted and amazingly beautiful. There they will see what pure love has preserved and that the gift of physical beauty is only enhanced when it is used in service of God

As for Dolores, her part in that movie brought her in close contact with Clare. The life of the saint she was about to play could not but make her feel like a false image of the real thing. 

 “I caught my reflection in a mirror, she said, and I thought, Im the caricature, a dressed-up form of this lady who existed.  

Soon after the movie ended, Dolores opted for the real thing and left all that success to enter the convent as a nun and she has now lived there for more than 50 years.


Thanks to 20th century Fox who took great pains to ensure the film was historically and geographically accurate. 





 About to End  My Marriage,  I discovered How to Make my Husband Love me by  Kathy Murray 

6 07 2017


Californian Kathy Murray says she saved her marriage by giving up trying to control her husband. Despite considering herself a feminist, she follows – and now teaches others – the approach of a controversial book called The Surrendered Wife, which tells women to stop nagging their partners and start treating them with more respect.

The first time I married I was divorced by 26. I married for the second time at 32 but soon found myself sleeping in the guest room. My husband and I fought all the time.

Much of our fighting stemmed from the fact I thought my husband was clueless when it came to raising the children (we had four children between us aged from four to nine years old). We also quarrelled about how to manage our finances, and how often we made love.

I was working full-time as chief finance officer for a private school and also volunteered at my kids’ school and in my community. My husband was a sales rep for a construction company but I was the breadwinner and acted like I was in charge.

I didn’t tell anyone I was in constant conflict with my husband. I was embarrassed, angry and resentful.

The six principles of being a ‘Surrendered Wife’

Relinquishes inappropriate control of her husband. Respects her husband’s thinking. Receives his gifts graciously and expresses gratitude for him. Expresses what she wants without trying to control him. Relies on him to handle household finances. Focuses on her own self-care and fulfilment

My husband often resorted to watching TV and snuggling with our pets as I’d rage at him over ignoring my needs. I mean all men want sex right? Not my husband. He wanted nothing to do with me. It was awful.

The more I told my husband how he should be, the less he’d try. I couldn’t figure it out so I dragged him to marriage counselling. But that only made things worse, so we sent our children to counselling since they too bore the brunt of so much of our conflict. That didn’t work either.

So I went to counselling by myself and complained about my husband for more than a year. Spending thousands of dollars, only to find myself nearer divorce than when I started.

I’d cry, fight, yell and pout, thinking he would eventually come around, but he didn’t. I lost weight, went to the gym and started getting attention from men which was tempting to act on, but I knew I couldn’t do that, so I’d play the victim card and sulk. That didn’t work either.

I was about to end my marriage when I picked up a book called The Surrendered Wife by Laura Doyle. I mean, they don’t teach us how to be successful in marriage in school and the women in my life didn’t share the secrets either.

It was incredibly humbling to recognise that I had something to do with why my marriage was failing and perhaps even why my first marriage failed. But it was also empowering.

I didn’t know I’d been disrespectful to my husband or even that I’d been controlling and critical.

I thought I was being helpful and logical. I just didn’t know that respect for men is like oxygen, so no wonder my husband was no longer interested in me sexually.

I’ll never forget the day I first apologised to my husband for being rude for correcting him in front of the children, or the day I said “whatever you think” when I’d previously been extremely opinionated about what he should do.

I had trained my husband to ask my permission for everything. And then complained about it for a year in counselling that he couldn’t make simple decisions!

I relinquished control of my husband’s life, choices and decisions and instead I focused on my own happiness. I was no longer acting like his mother and started acting like his lover.

We were fighting less and less and my husband started reaching out to hold my hand or pull me in for a kiss.

I had no idea that I was responsible for my own happiness. I thought my husband should make me happy.

I’ve now found subtle ways of getting my husband in the mood for sex, which is far more effective than the days of begging, crying or yelling about wanting it. Even if I’m not in the mood and he is, I often find myself getting in the mood just by being open to receiving pleasure.

My kids began to notice the change in our relationship too, and as a result, their behaviour improved and our home became peaceful and fun again.

Women often ask me if my approach is about dumbing myself down or becoming a submissive wife. I tell them I am a feminist. Surrendering is acknowledging you can’t change or control anyone but yourself. That’s empowering!

​http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-37861459





For Husbands:20 Lessons from Bible on how to Love your Wife 

23 06 2017

​╔════  🚨   💎   🚨 ════╗

            *Love  Your* 

   *”Own Beautiful Wife”*
  🔹Don’t shout at your

       wife when you are

       talking. It really 

       hurts her. 

       *Proverbs 15:1*
  🔹Do not speak evil 

       of her to anyone. 

       Your wife will become

       who you call her. 

      *Gen. 2:19*
  🔹Do not share her love

      or affection with another

      woman.

      It is called Adultery.

      *Matt. 5:28*
  🔹Never compare your

       wife to another woman.

       If the other woman was

       good for you, God would

       have given her to you.

      *2 Cor. 10:12*
  🔹Be gentle and 

       accommodating. She

       has sacrificed so much

       to be with you. 

       It hurts her deeply

       when you are hash

       and irritating. 

       Be tender.

       *Eph. 4:2*
  🔹Hide nothing from her.

       You are now one and

       she’s your helpmate.

       Let there be no secret

       you are keeping 

       from her.

       *Gen. 2:25*
  🔹Do not make negative

       comment about her

       body. She risked her

       life and beauty to carry

       your babies. She is a

       living soul not just

       flesh and blood. 

       *Proverbs 18:22*
  🔹Do not let her body

       determine her worth.

       Cherish and appreciate

       her even till old age.

       *Eph. 5:29*
  🔹Never shout at her

       in the public and in

       private. If you have

       an issue to sort with

       her, do it in the privacy

       of your room.

       *Matt. 1:19*
  🔹Thank and appreciate

       her for taking good

       care of you, the kids

       and the house. It is

       a great sacrifice she

       is making.

       *1 Thesso. 5:18*
  🔹All women cannot

       cook the same way;

       appreciate your 

       wife’s food.

       It is not easy to cook

       three meals a day,

       365 days a year 

       for several years.

       *Pro. 31:14*
  🔹Never place your 

       siblings before her.

       She is your wife. 

       She is one with you.

       She must come 

       before your family.

       *Gen. 2:24*
  🔹Invest seriously in

       her spiritual growth. 

       Buy books, tapes and

       any material that will

       edify her *&* strengthen

       her walk with God. 

       That’s the best thing

       you can do for her.

       *Eph. 5:26*
  🔹Spend time with her

       to do Bible study 

       and pray.

       *James 5:16*
  🔹Make time to play

       with her and enjoy

       her company.

       Remember when you

       are dead, she’s gonna

       be by your grave but

       your friends may be

       too busy to attend

       your funeral. 

       *Ecc. 9:9*
  🔹Never use money

       to manipulate or 

       control her. All your

       money belongs to

       her. She is a joint heir

       with you of the 

       grace of God.

       *1 Pet. 3:7*
  🔹Do not expose her

       weakness. You will be

       exposing yourself too.

       Be a shield around her.

       *Eph. 5:30*
  🔹Honour her parents

       and be kind to her

       siblings.

       *SOS. 8:2*
  🔹Never cease to tell

       her how much you

       love her all the days

       of her life. Women

       are never tired of

       hearing that.

       *Eph. 5:25*
  🔹Grow to be like Jesus.

       That’s the only way

       you can be a good

       and godly husband.

      *Rom. 8:29*

     *SAVE A HOME TODAY,* 

              *PASS IT ON* 

TO ALL MEN PLEASE
LIKEWISE TO ALL WOMEN.








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